Take That Miley

I took the little dog on a jog this morning through the country club next to my neighborhood in attempts to pick up a man... to work on my cardio. I'm coming up at one and a half miles and this pick up truck slowly drives past me. The forty something driving the service vehicle idles past me grinning creepily and waves. If I could read his mind, I'm sure he'd be saying something like this

So here I am, running like 4 mph (not sexy), dripping in sweat (mildly attractive), and rocking the greasiest of hair styles that is only possible when you wash your hair once a week (how do you like them apples). Why is this guy undressing me with his look then? I look over after he is gone at my shadow and its dawns on me. My ass jiggles more running than Miley's does twerking at the VMA's. And really, I'll take that as a compliment for all the larger ladies trying to get in shape.

For this accomplishment, I have a couple people to thank.
The Sun, I know you aren't a person, but you helped me see my shadow.
My best friend's boyfriend, Daniel, who introduced me to the dead lift and squat. Without him, my ass would just be giggly, but now its big and giggly.
And last but certainly not least, my mama. Because obviously, I got it from my mama.

So Miley, don't be too upset, but I can twerk better than you without even trying.

You'll be okay, I promise.